Tuesday, June 26, 2012

I am deteriorating rapidly

Have I mentioned that Dr Tabubil also has a theater degree?  When she's not feeling well, we all know about it.  Right now she has a head cold, and has begged me to skype her because she's feeling poorly.  Poor Darling.  
            “Hi, Dr Tabubil! How are you feeling?”
            A very very very small voice said “I am deteriorating rapidly.”
            “Oh dear – “I floundered, lost for words.
            “And my upper lip feels funny.”
            “Because of all the nastiness in my nose. It tickles.”
            “Yuck!” I said. “Why don’t you use a Kleenex and mop it up?”
            There was a sound like a very small mouse heaving a sigh. “Because I’d have to reach for it and my arm hurts because of the aches and pains, you know. I am deteriorating rapidly.”
            “Tell you what” I said. “Why don’t I hang up and you got get a tissue, okay?”
            A tiny, put-upon-mouse sigh. “Fine.”
            So she did.
            I called back. “Hi Dr Tabubil!”
            “My throat hurts.”
            “Have you tried drinking some tea with honey in it?”
            “I don’t like tea. And I don’t like honey either. And my nose is all stuffed up. I can’t breathe through it at all.”
            I tried being helpful. “You know what I do? I put some eucalyptus oil drops into a mug of boiling water and drape a cloth over my head and inhale. It really does help.”
            “Oh Tabubilgirl.” The mouse gave a little sigh. “Nobody in Queensland uses Eucalyptus oil. Eucalyptus is everywhere and it’s just so… common. ”
            “But it works.”
            “That’s not the point.”
            “And I really doubt that Australians are such snobs about something that works so well.”
            “Huh.” The mouse expressed doubt and gave a weak cough. “But I still can’t breathe through my nose.”
            “Why don’t you give it a try?” I coaxed.
            A long pause. “But I’m deteriorating rapidly.”
            I hung up.

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